in l0ve-d with LJF

i guess i am mugging.
but nthn gets in.

-because of you-

the roses
7/30/2007 09:16:00 pm

so long never blog.
ytd was so boring! finished my 5items.=D
i guess my stamina is like shitnow. but i manage to reach all As!
scaredfor2.4=(
mr ang was so pissed ytd, and he made me stayed back after school!
argh, made me sit at the tablesoutside staffroom,
made me stare blankly at the maths questions.
1ST TIME OK! rah!
i gt maths geog mt cts on tues!
i am gonna complain like crazy agn.
3 tests in one day ok!kill me la.
andnow i am still slacking away.
went bugis after tuition today shopw till 5,
bought a skirt, a belt! although i diden intend too.
i wanted to save up. =X
then went lib till 9 and only did 2 chapts of geog!
omg so slow and i guess nthn went into my useless brain=(
helpppppppp.
i wanna go out tmr agn. but how?

stop giving me excuses.
stop giving me innocent faces.
stop giving me that stare.
cus i am not going to buy them anymore!

-go away!-

the roses
7/28/2007 10:55:00 pm

new skin!

the roses
7/27/2007 10:59:00 pm

-we quarreled once again.

the roses
7/23/2007 10:30:00 pm

sat was like super tiring.
ok mostly everyday is tiring for me! haha!
after tuition, i met jul for chippy.
oh reminded me that i owe her money haha.
then met dancers for cip at BUTS.
we got super good spot but super tiring job.=)
its like collecting ticket and taggin them.
haha but we bought ice cream=)
then went home super late agn.
omg, sheryl dad fetch me lb jul and serena to dhoby. then when we were bout to alight lb almost step out, behind theres a bus keepin honkin! soo irritatin.
then we didnt know go down or wad.
then the car move suddenly!
lb almost fell out of the car. all of us scream like mad. haha!
but phew its just a great shock la.

then sunday? nthn better.
tmr got mt orals! oh no i think is l.c? ehh? i forgt le crap.

- go away -

the roses
7/23/2007 10:22:00 pm

woah super busy week la.
wnna blog also too tired. haha.
ok, fri was soo good/bad.
it was PHEW after the performance.
haha! i diden embarass myself!=D
i look soo nice in sari! haha! yay. took super lot photos.
should upload it someday.
then waited hours for the ndp rehearsal until 5 plus den we manage to mark once thru only! argh.
then met the sec4s! with nura and some sec4s who i dunno.
haha but i blends in well hahahahahahhs!=P
it was like char bdae and i gt nthn for her! crap!=X
serious busy.
jas made her a cake soo sweet=D
let me see who i know there...
py, ana, jas, rw, jul, char, chewy, huiyi, ok i dont rmb who is there err..
forgt it! haha. just random.
we got sparkling candle which kept relighting! haha!
imagine how irritated is char!=DD
then we threw her into the pool !!!!!!!
it was like super funny!
then she pulled jas in then all of us were like running away!
haha. phew i didnt gt caught!=D
they were soo unhappy that they gt bottle filled with water and i got SPLASHED WHEN I AM RUNNING LIKE CRAZY! ahhhhhhhhhh!
hmpf.
it was super fun la.
then went home with rw ana and huiyi. chatted happily on the way! ahahahh!
nura went home early.=(

why get so upset over such person?
is he worth for your tears my dear?
i shall say no more.

the roses
7/22/2007 07:45:00 pm

my only wish now is to perform sucessfully tmr.

it will be a BUSY day.
i hope i can cope.

i still cant tie a sari argh!

-pain-

the roses
7/19/2007 10:00:00 pm

FINALLY,
i got my new heels! yay!=DDD
so damn ex.

today learning journey SUX! we walked through the damn orchard seeing sculpture.
instead of shopping!
almos everywhere got new season out already la!
burberry new season is super super nice ok!
i fell in love with a white coat and a grey err coat also haha.
but we couldnt shop la.=(
and i saw the lv white wallet super nice la.
how i wish i am born in a rich family. haha.
then we hardly get to see many stuffs but after we went back school i couldnt resist temptation.
so rezi and i went orchard agn.
haha! i guess i will get the coat if i could and the sony red cam. IF i could.=(
and i finally finally got a pair of new heels which is like costing a BOMB.
bangles and accesories i dunno how la. heck cares.
i got orals and l.c nx week when i am losing my voice! argh!

i have nothing to say about it.
i am tired already.
i guess i shall let it go.

i am gonna flunk my nx c.ts- and napfa.
argh.
my schedule is fully packed for the nex 5 days.=((
busy me. haha.
can i be like rich loaded with money for 24hrs?
just 24rs? i think i will be contented an get all i wanted. haha!
i wonder when is my next shopping spree.
i shall stop all of them for now.=D

-unpredictable-

the roses
7/18/2007 11:04:00 pm

after all the ups and downs we go through in life.
after every moment we spent tgt.
in the end we are just being a 'hi-bye' friend.
is this all you wanted? from the start?
if it is, i rather choose to not know you.

i got steamboat today!=DD
but i ate soo little.
so no appetite.=(

i need to change my cam! i want the sony red one!
i need to change my ipod!
i need to change my bag!
i need to change my shoe!
and i need new heels and bangles!
i need to GO SHOPPING!!

where the hell are you again?

char, thanks for the letter/email!=)
sooo sweet. i diden know you take note of me=X
haha. hmm it definitely helped me alot and ya i was quite surprise to see that.
i will reply you asap =) jiayous for you too!

-DANCE-

the roses
7/17/2007 10:13:00 pm

ouch! i just got a paper cut =((
haha.
i lazy to do homework agn...rah!
i dont even know today have what homewrk.
forget it i dont wanna wake up late agn.
i am going to bed.

i need a plaster!=(
to cover the wound on my little finger and in my heart.

the roses
7/16/2007 10:36:00 pm

dance, dance, dance.
probably is the only way that lead me to survival.
but it is soo tiring.

wtf la! everyone is like against me in the family is it?
OVER SMALL LITTLE F-ING THING ALSO WANTS TO QUARREL WITH ME!!!
arghhhhh!!!!!!!! i say sry they they NOW THEN SAY SRY NAHNAHANAHNAHNAH!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
esp that freaking small idiot over there kbkp! only know how to complaint complaint!
and my dad there adding salt to the wound!
HAVE THEY THOUGHT OF ME!?! HAVE THEY!!?@!
wadever la!!! you there say dont care her la! who cares man!?
then you here saying more and more.
i had enough ok!
perhaps you dont know i am still crying in this corner,
strugling with the damn FuCkeD up life now.
the day had oready started out so badly, getting scolded by dm,
getting scolded by classmates, getting naggings from form teach,
seeing the way you laughed and play around with others without even taking a glance of me!
and i was sooo damn sick, i am like not even 1/4 asleep in class.
argh!my life is not improving! not a little bit.
i am like venting all my anger here!
slamming the door at you does nt mean i am showing attitude ok!
its just that i dont wish to see you!!! it makes me wanna cry.
grrrrrrrrrr...
i just wish for somebody out there to gv me a lil hug.=(
haha. eveyone goes through many many many sorrows in life,
perhaps this is one of them.
at least i suffer now, i dont wish to suffer later.
maybe this is what everyone goes through in their family life.
is it?EXCEPT FOR JULYNN GOH! with her cutiepie sister and her super mum.
argh. ok its over.=D

Labels: aOZPWK FHJ

the roses
7/16/2007 10:13:00 pm

-SICK

it wasnt that bad afterall.
this is wad i always say to myself.
but it is not working anymore.
sometimes keeping quiet, shutting up doesnt seem that bad too.
rather than crying out everything to u
why bother thinking of consequences when it always turn out the other way?
why bother caring about others when they dont bother you?
why bother thinking for others when they dont even think of you?
why bother crying over them?
why bother killing myself over that small matter?
why bother saying everything out when i know i shouldnt?
its all becuase i trusted you! and cared bout you!
BUT WHY DO YOU NEED TO TREAT ME LIKE THAT!??!
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
TELL ME WHYYYYYY!
remembering the times we spent tgt sitting at the edge of the roof,
remembering the times i cried on your shoulder,
remembering the times when you made me smile!
it sound soo perfect so wonderful, BUT ITS NOT!
have you ever have a thought of my feelings have you? HAVE YOU?
i was strong but now i am not because i am soo sick.
PHYSICALLY SICK, AND EMOTIONALLY TOOOOO!!!!
this is how you will feel if you feel soo unfair. soo baised. and that why is my life so imperfected.
-LOST.

the roses
7/15/2007 10:49:00 pm

oh my freaking !@~@$#@%!@?!@#!@~@?!!@?
I AM LIKE SOO DAMN TIRED ALREADY AND GUESS WAD.
i went out of the room to get milo,
then i found my rabbit missing!!!!!!!
I WAS FREAKING OUT OK.
so i went around the house finding its no where to be seen so i went out.
i thought it will be like last time it will sit outside wait for me
but i find the whole damn level, ITS NO WHERE TO BE SEEN.
i was like omg...
the i went down one flr to search but cant find.
then i went to 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 flrs to find and i was in pyjamas,
but i diden care cus i was gonna cry.
then i thought i rabbit jump down the building or what i search downstairs sooo long but cant find.
and my mum and dad will scold me like hell if i tell them!
argh.
then i went the flrs to checked agn.
BAREFOOTED.
then i ws like my rabbit can fall down the stairs but it cnt climb stairs wad.
then i was like err rabbits can jump dont they?
so i walked 1 stairs up and THEN,
it's lying down on the stairs.
I WAS LIKE GOING CRAZY SOON.
phew phew phew phew phew!!!!
i carry it back and feed it and now i m here bloggin bout it!
arghh! sooo stupid.
ok i am yawning.
i shall go wash my feet andgo to bed.

-nights-

the roses
7/14/2007 11:47:00 pm

i am seriousy drop dead tired-
right after the damn freaking f-ing tiring cip.
i am not gonna do that agn.
its like going super many blocks to collect newspaper!!!!!!
walaos. darn it soo tired that i decided to cancel all the events and go home to see my daddy!
then we went out shopping.
but i was soooo no more strength left.

i am still in the midst of my heels searching.

-sleeping-

the roses
7/14/2007 10:59:00 pm

HAPPY BDAE JULYNN!=DDDD

let me sing you a bdae song,

happy bdae to you

happy bdae to you,

happy bdae to my gf!

happy bdae to you!

muacksss with lotsa lotsa saliva.=.=!!!

HAHAHS.

oh my i spent soo much effort on the present! yay!

hope she like it.

got to take taxi in the morning so she cant see it. gosh. haha!

hmm. went ps today with jul and serena!

holding the damn huge bag of presents.

went DBS tried to make a new card and they dont allow.

walaos queued soo long =.=!

i need new heels for rh! hahahhs.

hmm shall go shopping tmr.

i realise i am like shopping until very late this few days.=))

woah! got soo many people treating me to movie tmr! hahahahhs yay.

should i go?

for movie with them? shopping with jul?? or church?? or movie with 2a? or bball? or homework??

oh gosh got cip early in the morning 7 till 2!? @ PASIR RIS!!!

crap la..

WENT BBALL today!! yay!=D sooo fun.

but the court sux. the little boy is sooo cute.

he keep picking ball for me hahahhs!=DD

the roses
7/13/2007 10:22:00 pm

-busy:)

the roses
7/12/2007 11:11:00 pm

haha! i was lazy to blog ytd.
and so today also!
arghh.
today lessons were bored to death.
TMR ALSO.=(((((
haha i am done with letters. but i recieved replies!
grrrrrrr. so that means i got to write agn haha!
nvm its fun.
hmms TODAY DANCE WAS CANCELED!!!=(((
went ps with serena ate CHIPPY!
finally i dont have to go all the way to far east to get it.
and to see their damn attitude.
ps one is soo much better.
we were sitting on the floor cus we were soo lazy to find places haha!
and jul suddenly called us from behind.
she go watch transpormer la ,shit!!
then we went little india for sari la.
i am soo pissed off now.
nice one all so ex cheap one all so ugly.
omg, so obvious.
hahahhs!
but i dunno la see first lor maybe i dun wan try sari le.
later wear then everything drop i dontknow how.
and that hopeless rezi cant gv me some help
HAHAHAHHS.
stupid jul wan wear sc. =((
i cant believe nx week is the performance ALRD.
we didnt even reherse at all.
i was sooo shock la. hmm.

eeeeyer, life's now sooo boring and tiring.

i forgt to bring my book home to read when today i have no homewrk! =((
hope it wont go missing.

does lending you a hairpin helps to save the relationship?
if it does, i dont mind lending u a million of it.

-in a dilema-

the roses
7/10/2007 10:08:00 pm

hmm. slacked throughout the day =D
saw my baby cousin! SOOO CUTE! hahahhs.
i wanna carry him! =(
miss my aunty soo much! hahahs.
i bought 3 new books today! hahahhs.
all also very nice lor dunno which one to read 1st.
judith mcnaught is really a good author!=D
just random.
i wanna eat my high chew la! should have bought it just now.
argh.
i wrote nevy letter like FINALLY.
but i still owe huiyi and zhiyun. tsk!
i find the time to write the story i said ytd la huh.
i want to go read my book now!=DD

tmr school shit...
tmr dance!=DD

i dont know how to face you,
i dont know what to do.
perhaps its really all my fault.
perhaps i did something wrong.
but i dont know how to pay for it.
i hope you can understand and tok to me bout it?
cus i really dont know whats on your mind.
seeing you disappearing from my life really hurts.
and i dont like it.

having friendship probs sux.

walaos!!!!! MY BROTHER IS SOOO DAMN IRRITATING.

-sorry-

the roses
7/08/2007 09:49:00 pm

so tired!!!!
just finish practisin piano,
mum was like this song that song non stop!=(
hahahhs i went church today! yayyy!
ok fine in heels agn.
oh man, my shoulder hurts!! its gettin worst.
my "whole body" cramps is still there lor.=(
walaos saw a bitch today,
sooo *-ing fat and ugly,
there flirtin with brandon they all.=.=
she think she what soo big ar? try borrowin shirts from the boys so gain attention.
walaos you so hopeless la.
then there whining away like a pest.
just that you dont know the guys complain so much about you lor.
BITCH! hope you know who i am toking about.
hahahahhs. i sooo mean,
forgt it~

god,
help me help me
help me help me help me!!!
HAHAHAHHS.
pastor jeff sooo damn funny la!

i learnt some veryveryvery interestin and touching meangin of life in chi and eng tuition.
so qiao both tokin bout family breakdown. =.=
both passages are very meaningful lor.
esp the chi one, when laoshi ask me to oral it out i waslike tearing,
hahahs.
i should qoute it down here tmr! cus now, I AM SLEEPY~
hahahhs nights dears.

-OUCH! stop hurting me.-

the roses
7/07/2007 10:09:00 pm

I CANT MOVE.
ACHESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!
whole body is like OUCH OUCH OUCH! i cant move.
so pain!!!!!
ARGH!
whole body as in WHOLEBODY!SERIOUSLY!
nono wait err not literally that whole damn body.
forgt it! i think you get it.

TODAY SUX! FUCK THE DAMN DAY OK!
there is like theft caseS in class.
clare mar and dunno who lost alot money.
i didnt care la.
THEN I WENT WISMA,
MANGO 70% SALE!
I OPEN MY WALLET.
ITS EMPTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ALLLLLLL AS IN ALLLLLLL! MY MONEY IS MISSING!
omg.
i was like soo fucked up ok!
wth la. i immediatedly called yale!
oh man, i am gonna KILL the damn thief!
you better hide well, b4 i F THE HELL OUT OF YOU!
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!
spoil my whole mood ok!
i thought wow, everything is back to normal life.
so not stessful.
ARGHH!
WOWWWWW!wad a beautiful life.

-life's screwed-

the roses
7/06/2007 10:18:00 pm

gosh. sec 4s stepped down today!
i am like =(((((((! i dont know.
i will definitely DEFINITELY miss you angels!
must still come and visit us ok!
and must must must miss me too! haha.
all the best for ur o's! good luck!!=))
the cake is so nice.
stupid jul dun wan feed me! make my hands so dirty! I STILL RMB OK!
rahh!
i was soooo excited for today la but it turn out soooo tiring.
and laoshi taught soooo many new stuffs!
and the DAMN 2.4 TODAY KILLED ME!
DARN IT.

mummy called me a good girl! =DDDD
cus i helped her fold clothes!
yay!!
oh man, forgt it. sound sooo childish.

crap! i still owe soo many people letters.
now wad.

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
tmr got school again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
f-ing school.
i have no idea why i hate school so damn much now.

BUT today i got soo relaxed! =D
as in like all the stress is like flown away or somethin?
its gone thats y i was like soo crazy in dance! hahahahhs=))
WOAHH! yay.
shit. i forgot to do homework.
forgt it. i want to sleep ler.
i think the loads of work and pressure was real lot on the 1st week.
today, ITS GONE! YAY!!! =)
but i still got the homework.
AIYA DARN IT!

i choose trip sci ss/lit for 1st choice!
trip sci ss/geog 2nd...
OH MAN. HELP ME.
i think i aiming damn high now.
but i still want to gv it a shot.=D
hahahhs!

oh!! nx week onwards we are like dancin bollywood AGN!?
CRAP LA!!!!!!!

-where you?-

the roses
7/05/2007 10:06:00 pm

1st week of school ended.
it was the worst week throughout my cedar life.
hahahhs.
it ended. i hope all those crap ended too.
today 1st day of 2nd week i hope it is good?
slacked throughout the whole day.
so tired! was like dozing off in lesson.
but change place alr! and i am right in the center front!
rahh! but i finally got the fan =D
so sickening i still owe homeworks but lazy =X
still in the midst of sorting out skirts.
dance cip at amk mrt 820 report 14july.
yay just one more day dance will resume! =)))
finally passed my letter to xinyun.
DAMN IT. wad bout the sec 3 and4
crap! argh! sorry nevy and zhiyun! dun smack me k!=XX
rahhhhhhhhhhh.
i shall go watch tv now.
waitin for jul for 100000 mins sux. haha!=D
toilet queen.hahahahhs!
tmr got tuition damn sian.
TMR GOT SCHOOL! DARN IT!!!!!!!!!!

-tired-

the roses
7/03/2007 08:51:00 pm

eeks! the previous post is bloggin bout ytd not today.
its like blogged at 230am. haha!

today i went bugis!=D
ALOT OF THINGS HAPPENED. I AM SERIOUS.
MY LEG HURTS! SHOULDER TOO!
ouch.
but i bought 3 tops and somethin else!
hahaha! yay!
bankrupt agn..=.=
I SWEAR I WILL NEVER WEAR HEELS OUT SHOPPIN AGN!
so pain la. got blister somemore
rah!!
wondering why i can go out right?
haha cus i quarreled with my mum agn!
she made me promise her alot of things la! wth.
made my life more miserable.
one of it is: PRACTISE PIANO EVERYDAY ONCE YOU WAKE UP OR COME BACK FROM SCHOOL OR ELSE GROUNDED TILL NEXT YEAR.WTF...
ARGH!
she say she see my year end results then decide to let me out not.
its ike 2months later!!!grrrrrrrrrrrr...
forgt it.
i am so stupid i thought i take to little india walk to bugis nearer cus purple line.
i suffered in my heals.

omg! we got stalked by 4 man ok!
ok at 1st right is 3 man sellin durian i walk past them then they stop me and they were like pullin me and sayin stupid things la!
wad be my girlfriend ok? gv me your number can.
WADEVA i shook my hands off them and banged past them.
rezi freaked out
HAHAHAHHHS she was like HUH!!?!?!
lucky i am brave.=DD
rezi was like shakin away la.
i was stoped by them for bout 10 mins ok.
damn it.
i was so pissed that i just pushed them away cus they were like blockin my way!
walaos! rmb... i learn taekwondo ok!somemore junior black la!
HMPF!
then we were walkin and rezi wanted to buy a tube then i was choosin then this malay guy came out of the stall and tok dunno wad language then rezi was like huh?
so she decided not to buy.
den she walk away and she said loudly YUKY HE IS TAKIN PHOTO OF US RUN!
and i was quite blur cus that f-ing guy is blockin me.
when rezi walked away the guy pulled my hand ok! he was like tok dunno wad.
and i just walked away saying NNONOONONO!
then the guy ran after rezi and i freaked out.
i immediately run and find her. but i lost her la!
then she appear from behind tearing...
she was like the guy is followin now wad now wad.
then i pulled her walkin past the whole bugis street to like let him gt lost
but he walk super fast la! then we tot he stopped so we stop and shop for t-shirts.
when we turn behind! he is using his hp takin photo of us ok!
HE WAS LAUGHIN AWAY!
i got so F_ING fed up!
i was like BASTARD! and pulled rezi away.
cant he let us shop in peace!!!!
so we were playin maze agn.
so i decided to hide in the shop. haha.
the shop owner is so nice too.=))
so he couldnt come in.
and he kept patrollin around.
but i was takin my own sweet time choosin the clothes and bought 2! =D
then after HOURS we walked out he is no where to be seen.
PHEW.
so rezi was soooooo scared that she pulled me back to bugis junction.
argh! sooo irritatin!
i haven shop enough ok.
and my leg hurt mainly cus of him!
CURSE HIM TO DEATH LA!
so unlucky man today! why is my week so bad! RAHH!

and we got cheated!
rezi wanted to buy a small perfume cusomised for her seniors,
we thought its like so cheap cus the comtainer is sooo cute is those kind of antique.
so we took 3 and choose the perfume.
we thought the containers are $2 and the perfume $2.90.
BUT NO! is 1ml of perfume $2.90!!!
one small contains 9 ml ok!
WALAOS rezi cried la!
lucky she fill 1 only!
and i paid 20.90 for nthn!
wth!
stupid aunty slap her ass la!

gst increased kfc prices oso increased!
wth!!!
i eat one meal so pathetic that me and rezi decided to share a large coke and cheese fries cus we were broke.
walaos stupid gst!!!
my dad was like money go out more come in lesser la!
shit.
and he suppose to increase my allowance he decreased it.
ARGH!

soooo many things happened today!
i cant believe it.
still got more but i am soo tired. tmr got school somemore SHIT LA!
=((

tmr got dance meeting.=D

-love you-

the roses
7/02/2007 10:40:00 pm

guess where i went?
HAHAHAHAHHS!=DD
my day is quite bad but it ended nicely atleast.=)

i went cine KBOX!!=DD
and got snow ball! damn nice.
and i missed it soo much althought the last time was like errr,
2weeks? 1week b4?
hahahahahhs.
my head is soo unbalanced now. @.@
haha.

IMISSDANCE!!!!=(

the roses
7/02/2007 01:18:00 am

HAPPY YOUTH DAY!

maybe i can go out tmr.
maybe not... .....
i want to watch movie!
i got alot of things to buy! haha!=DD
shopping shopping...
rahh. i am still grounded.

[[ dont read ]]
just being random.

mummy daddy,
prob i am not the kind of girl you all wanted. sorry.
i am not perfect for everyone.
maybe you all are insensitive,
but you gv birth to a very sensitive girl.
for the past 14yrs, you never minded your words to me.
maybe you diden realise how hurting it is.
maybe you mean it.
i try my best to be a good girl,
but you all dun seem to appreciate at all
and even asked for more.
saying i am a accident child and she wanted my bro.
instead of my bro a accidental child and she wanted me.
infront of me and her friends.
saying i am useless dun wanna care bout me and all sort of words to hurt me.
maybe you think i diden take it to heart.
but even the words is said 10yr before.
its still kept in my heart.
i dun wanna be the child whom you choose to abandaon.
i dun wan to be the child you hate.
your words are sooo hurtful.
why cant u understand me more!
why cant u show your love to me!
i noe you love me! but i cnt see it at all!
i said this becus i dun like it!
and i cant take it anymore.

BUT!
I KNOW I SHOULD BE CONTENTED.
I KNOW AT LEAST I HAVE A FAMILY.
I KNOW SOMETIME I FEEL FAMIL WARMTH.
AND I LOVE MY FAMILY.
I AM HAPPY.
just that i cant stand the times when you make my heart shatter.

AND I THINK POSITIVELY.=))

the roses
7/01/2007 12:27:00 pm